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Housekeeping: Things Are Changing

May 23, 2016 Leave a Comment

If you’ve been visiting this page for the last three years, then you know I’ve had this spiffy set-up for that long. Well, I still really like what’s happening on this website, but I’m feeling the desire to do a bit of tidying.

And instead of doing a grand reveal, the changes will be made here and there.

It can be a game of “I spy with my little eye…” if you want it to be.

This past year, I’ve had the privilege of working alongside some talented graphic designers, photographers, and straight up artists. Some of their knowledge has rubbed off on me, and some of them have taken an idea I’ve had in my head and made it real!

I started this website with the idea of being a travel writer, but as I tried my hand at it, I realized that I had no desire to write out step-by-step guides of how to best walk the city of Prague or explore the center of Vienna. Nope. I know a lot of amazing writers do it, and I totally read their articles!

But I have no patience.

There’s something glorious, to me, to draw pictures from travels to some other deep thought or wondering. Is there a name for that type of writing? Not journalistic writing…but writing that one might do in his or her journal? So I’m a journalist of a type.

If you write, you know that you’re supposed to have a niche. Knitting stories and yarn. Lifting weights and people’s spirits with words. Nannying and fairytale writing.

I thought my niche was traveling.

I love it, so it’s not a bad thought. But I’m not a professional. And I’m average. I have no special circumstance to create a niche.

Anyway, all that to say that I’m in the process of exploring to find my niche. Stick around to see what that is!

My favorite joke is that I’d like to be a professional pen pal. And in some ways, I guess that’s how I view this website. It’s my on-going letter to you.

Kind vs. Nice

May 19, 2016 1 Comment

by Barbara Brutt @BarbaraBrutt @cordiallybarbara

A month ago, I started to be irritated by the word “nice”. Is it because I’m not a nice person?

People almost always use “nice” interchangeably with “kind“. Are they the same?

Calling a man a “nice guy” is the kiss of death to his dating life. What is it about nice that makes us cringe?

[Tweet “”nice guy” is the kiss of death to a man’s dating life. Why’s nice makes us cringe?”]

I’ve complimented women on outfits or accessories before, and I’ve had a few of them respond with, “Oh, you are so kind.” And yet, am I kind for my compliments?

A dilemma.

My brain couldn’t handle all the thinking on its own (I’ve been bothered about these two words for months) so I went to the streets with my question. I asked on Facebook. I emailed people. I asked friends as we chowed down on burgers and fries at Vienna’s Burgerista.

Kind vs. Nice. What’s the difference between these two words?

Nice seems shallow.

Kind is something deeper?

Nice is less sincere than kind…

One friend’s stated, “Nice is just an action and can be used to get what you want. Kindness is from the heart and is about self-sacrifice.”

So we agree.

Kindness comes from the heart, and niceness is just an action. And yet, how do you know if someone is truly kind or just nice? How do you measure that? What does each word acted out look like?

[Tweet “Kindness comes from the heart, and niceness is just an action.”]

What if I told you kindness sometimes looks not nice?

One of my Facebook friends chimed in on the kind vs. nice discussion on my status. Deidre Stevens wrote, “Sometimes being kind is not being nice. I am kind to my students by forcing them to redo assignments that were not good enough, but they don’t think I’m being nice when I tell them their work is unacceptable. Kindness lasts longer and does more good than niceness.”

Hold up. What!

Deidre revealed an example of kindness in action, and in her students’ eyes, her kindness is not nice. (Not until they’re graduated and working their own career of course.)

I think this is key.

Kindness was beginning to solidify in my mind, but I was still lost when it came to niceness.

What if I told you nice is just a social expectation?

Another Facebook friend, Josh Mann, explained, “I think nice is equivalent to polite, a social expectation. Everyone should be “nice” to each other. Whatever the meaning of the original word, it’s been watered down to mean little more than “good” or “pleasant”. It’s such a “meh” word!”

Nice is such a “meh” word.

Everyone agrees that nice is nice…but Josh shared why. We expect people to be nice.

I think I’m finally understanding the difference between kind and nice.

Quick Shout Out: But I couldn’t have done it without an amazing community that enjoys discussing my questions and sharing their thoughts (thanks, you guys)!

Kindness ≠ Niceness

Kind is a heart action. It sees into the future and desires to better the life quality of others. This type of characteristic can be seen in the parent who teaches their child that certain behaviors are inappropriate (equipping this young human for future social interactions aka niceness) or the next-door neighbor who routinely shovels the widow’s driveway, gently refusing to be paid.

Nice is a social expectation. We’re expected to be polite in the presence of strangers, acquaintances, clients, employers, colleagues, relatives, aliens, etc. This type of politeness can be seen in the opening of a door for someone or gesturing to allow another car to pull out in front of you during rush hour.

[Tweet “”Kind” is a heart action while “nice” is a social expectation.”]

But what say you? Do you agree with how I’ve defined niceness and kindness or would you say it differently? Scroll down for the comments section.

May 2016 Inspiration

May 16, 2016 Leave a Comment

So I’m late. Better late than never, right?

It’s never too late to be inspired and to think in a bigger way. We live in a culture that offers inspiration at every turn whether it’s your hipster coffee shop or your pinterest account.

Hilarious memes bombard our lives, and I’m not complaining. I saw this meme recently, and I’ve been sending it to my friends. So now, I share it with you.

Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by a plane: — Pinterest

But my true inspirations this May have come in the form of friends. I had the pleasure of visiting a few friends before finally ending up at my new “home base.”

I picked up a nugget of wisdom from each couple. And I’ll share them with you!

Current Jam:

This song is my new favorite to listen to as I drive into summer. It’s beautiful lyrically and musically. It’s also rocketing this artist onto the world stage.

Current Food:

My friends in Colorado introduced me to this divine noosa yoghurt. I’m snobby when it comes to yogurt, and this stuff is amazing. Tart lemon had me thinking of a lemon meringue pie. If you see it in your grocery, grab it off the shelf. Seriously.

Wisdom Nugget: My Colorado friends unknowingly impressed upon me the beauty of intentionally treating loved ones with kindness and thoughtfulness. You may love someone, but you need to show it actively.

Current Read:

If you haven’t read my opinions on Bride of a Distant Isle, I think you need to open a new tab right now. I’m still thinking about this book, and it’s amazing layers and intriguing villain.

Current Obsession:

“My favorite @Patagonia Retro-X Vest is on sale! Visit kellyinthecity.com for details or... @liketoknow.it www.liketk.it/PmFS #liketkit #patagonia”: — Pinterest

My friends in Arizona didn’t mean to challenge me on my perception of fair trade, environmentally-conscious purchases, or organics. But they did. So here I am following Patagonia on instagram and perusing their website. Ooo, this dress is cute! I’m being inspired by individuals who are trying to better the world as they can.

Wisdom Nugget: My Arizona friends unknowingly showed me the importance of quality over quantity.

Current Quote:

For the highest rated quotes on the Internet visit http://svpicks.com/inspirational-quotes/: — Pinterest

I’ve been musing long on what the difference is between “kind” and “nice”. (Post to come on Thursday!) I think joy also is an illusive quality. People say you can choose joy, but it’s more substantial than happiness, which often directly correlates to the day’s circumstances.

Wisdom Nugget: My other Arizona friends unknowingly exhibited an underlying joy to every part of living even in their chaotic and sometimes frustrating days.

As you finish your May, I hope that you intentionally care for those around you, that you choose good stewardship of your resources, and that you discover underlying joy even in life’s stickiness.