Throughout my years in college and then even following college, I found myself living with host families for times as short as a night to times as long as a year and a half. The hospitality of each of these families regardless of culture, country, or state blew me away every time. I want to share from my experience some advice for living with families not your own.
1. Everyone does their dishes differently.
Most mommas are big on cleaning up after yourself and this is great, but be sure to ask your host or hostess, “How do you do your dishes?” They have a way and it’s probably different than yours.
2. Respect your host’s space.
Messes have a tendency of expanding and taking over (if you’re like me). Keep your mess contained in your own space, and if you work in a common area, keep it neat.
3. Communicate.
Seems like a no brainer, but a lot of people don’t want to make waves by bringing up a sticky subject. Making waves early on with relaxed communication will save everyone from a Tsunami Miscommunication later.
4. You’re not responsible for the host family’s happiness.
Sometimes your schedule and the host family’s will be at odds; their unhappiness is not your fault especially if you have no control over the said schedule difficulty. Let yourself off the hook of keeping everyone happy because as we all know, it’s impossible!
5. But you should still be sensitive to their family needs and happiness.
The family might need to have family time which doesn’t include you, that means heading out to a coffee shop by yourself or texting a friend. Their good family relationship will make your living experience a lot better.
6. Claim a chore and do it.
Houses take a lot of work. Chipping in to the care of the living space will make you more appreciative of the family and give you a claim on your own home for as long as you’re there.
7. Write a thank you note.
Everyone likes to be thanked. Nuf said.
8. Observe and serve.
Keep an eye out for the little nuances of how the family likes things and then imitate them. If mom sets spoons for everyone but a fork for herself, do the same when you set the table.
9. If they have kids, babysit for an evening.
Young parents will love you forever, and who doesn’t like to be loved forever?
10. Know when it’s time to leave.
You might be afraid that you won’t know, but you will. It’ll be time to move on and everyone will know it. Pack your bags, Jack, and hit the road.
In the past six years, I’ve easily been hosted by more than 23 families whether I was traveling in another country or even in my home state. Each one of these families has imprinted a desire in me to host others with the same type of generous hospitality that I’ve been hosted with. Hosting is really a pay it forward type activity.
How About You?
Have you ever lived with a family not your own? Or have you hosted others for a couple of nights? Bounce down to the comments and share your thought with
