oh, hello, it’s a new week again, and yet, here we are; in a world, radically different than what we ever expected. two and a half weeks ago, i was brainstorming travels for later in the year, and now, well, who knows. that thing paused life as we know it.
anxiety and panic stole the driver’s seat
what an unexpected lesson in remembering that we don’t have control of our lives like we think we do. and that all we can really control is our own response to it all — and if that means panic-stockpiling food, consuming pints of ice cream, manic exercising, and posting continuously to social media, THEN SO BE IT.
there are no rules about how you or i cope in all of this.
drop all of those “shoulds” that you’re carrying around. please. those “shoulds” are heavy and mean and awkward. they’re like trying to carry an octagonal suitcase without a handle. or pulling a heavy load with a flat tire. or trying to haul a clawing cat to safety. impossibly frustrating and painful.
babe, let go
what are you asking yourself to do that’s causing you to be utterly exhausted and overwhelmed?
where are you placing your energy that is leaking away your hope?
is your mind dwelling too long on uncontrollable factors?
how are you choosing to prioritize your resources (time, energy, routine, etc.)?
why are you giving yourself over to these different things?
routine disruptions can be terribly frustrating, especially when you had no choice in the matter. and if you’re a fixer or a do-er, there’s not much that can be done to overcome this opponent. maybe your creativity has been disrupted because crisis mode demands your attention and emotions. that’s okay.
you are immeasurably enough: yesterday, tomorrow, now.
sneak away with yourself, and tell “worry” to go sit in the corner for a little while (not forever, but for just a short break). it will be there for you when it’s time. and worry has it’s benefits, too — she allows you to prepare and create plans for future problems. so don’t be mean to that part of yourself, either.
as you sneak away, explore wonder. rediscover your inner child. what did you love to do before you grew up and shouldered the world? did you love to make up your own songs? could a bird song entice you to dance? would a tree’s branches beckon you to climb for the sky tops?
open your ears
open your eyes
open your touch
just because life as we know it has paused, does not mean that life has ended. while there’s room for grief, this is also the time to invite new adventure and lean into the unknown. we are resilient. you are resilient. i am resilient. hope may be just a glimmer, but the ninja characteristic of hope is that she stays, even when you’re sure she’s gone, she’s still there.
so live, dear one, live bravely and honestly, just as you have always done — let this time call out your inner warrior spirit, generous heart, and gentle strength
But yes, I often find myself contemplating Where’d You Go, Bernadette because it touched my heart. The characters have stuck with me. And their adventure too!
And the story wrecked me in the very best way by the final page.
While it was a slower read, it caused me much thought for a long while.