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7 Things I’m Loving Right Now

January 27, 2020 Leave a Comment

I go through phases of interests. Don’t you? Well, I decided to share 7 things I’m loving right now with you. And my gosh, if you want more music, I’ve got you! I feel like a bunch of artists have released some super good stuff recently.

1. OK (Anxiety Anthem) – Mabel

Spotify offered me this song, and the lyrics spoke to me…but it was also the sound of the music that caught my attention. So I’m sharing it with you. Cuz, guys, “it’s okay to not be okay.”

2. Black Holographic Unicorn Catsuit

Anyone else browse costumes in their free time? No, okay. That’s fine. But let me show you this fabulous Black Holographic Unicorn Catsuit. It’s just so extra, and I’m very here for it. (Thank you, slang, for giving me the adequate words for this crazy fun)

3. This Maya Angelou Quote

Life ain’t easy. You know it; I know it. And here’s the thing, we’re only responsible for ourselves. And when someone shows you something about yourself that you don’t like, maybe it’s time to grow. Maybe you can do better. Get curious.

Jane Francis Rhodes on Instagram: “~ My follower @becksclark shared this quote with me last night in a DM in regards to my current IG story discussing the history of…” — From Pinterest

4. This birthday hair!

If you’re in the Pittsburgh area and you need an amazing hairstylist, I’d be happy to point you to my girl, Shannon. She is just amazing, and I so appreciate that she understands my desire for low maintenance hair. But I do adore that she went all out with this fun styling!

5. Exchange Way in downtown Pittsburgh

This little light tunnel is just the cutest spot for evening photos, especially if you have fancy new phone. This spot is just so fun for photos, and the lights apparently change according to weather patterns. So it’s not only pretty, but it’s smart too (kinda like me hahaha)

6. A Cake Bar

I’ve heard of Pie Parties (pizza pies and fruit pies galore), but I’ve never heard of a cake bar. So I gathered my friends for a cake party of epic proportions. We had jalapeno popper cheesecake, crab cakes, taco cake, spice cake, Vietnamese Egg Coffee Cake, Cinnamon Roll Cake, Kahlua Cake, Pancake cake, quinoa cakes, veggie cupcakes, pistachio cupcakes, fruit cup cakes, strawberry pretzel salad cake, and so many other amazing cakes. I was in a food cake coma for three days after.

7. Reginald’s Coffee and Oram’s Donuts

Two other Pittsburgh businesses that are definitely worth checking out. I just LOVE this retro yet modern coffee shop, Reginald’s Coffee, and their partnership with Oram’s donuts. This is the best kind of partnership in my opinion. There’s a reason we have the word “bittersweet” in the English language.

Okay, bbs, whatever you’re up to this week, I hope you find surprise inspiration, sweetness, and more reasons to keep growing. I want good for you!

30 Regrets Before 30

January 20, 2020 6 Comments

30 regrets before 30 seemed like a catchy post name for my “oh-hey-i’m-30-now” post, and so here I am trying to come up with a list of 30 regrets. This is particularly hard if you’re anything like me and hate the word “regret” and also are mostly a goody-two-shoes with a tiny dash of wild, that probably tastes like cinnamon (and not cayenne or some firey spice). Oh, man, take a breath, Barbara.

I’m not really a fan of “regret.” I’d rather not consider any part of my life or decision to be a regret…because let’s see, pretty much any decision that left a bad taste in my mouth taught me something. So there’s that side of regret — the learning side. Regret is a GREAT teacher. In fact, it’s taught me a few things about myself, other people, and just general living. So you know what, I think I’m gonna have to admit it here: I’m grateful for my list of regrets.

Let’s go.

30 Regrets Before 30

Telling my next-door neighbor boy when we were both single digits that he couldn’t come over and play. (That probably sounds silly but watching his dejected shoulders leave my driveway is forever seared in my memory. I regret that.)
Removing my dip nails myself (my nails really regretted that).
Any time I’ve EVER cut my hair myself (especially that one time in high school where I decided bangs were a good idea…I think I slicked my hair into a ponytail for about 3 months waiting for that hair to grow back)
Not hanging out with friends because all I saw on my face was a giant zit. (Yeah, it was huge, but seriously, a zit is not the end of the world, teen Barbara)
Saying “no” to the boy who asked me to prom. (Teen Barbara, it was not a marriage proposal. Chill a little.)
Making any decision because the cute boy was doing it. (though some of those decisions actually turned out okay)
Thinking it was a good idea to go to school ever (I was homeschooled, and I begged and begged and begged until my parents agreed to put me in school. After a year, I asked if I could return to homeschool. Bless them for saying yes [I was not an easy child].)
Attending (any) party that felt like an obligation.
Keeping my word when it would have been healthier to excuse myself from whatever commitment I over-committed myself to.
Not traveling to Bolivia and Peru with my college friends one summer (granted, there were some other situations that made that tough).
Being too harsh and too “black and white” in a world that is layered and filled with many shades of color.
Refusing to allow myself to cry when I was hurt or sad because I thought I had to be strong. (I’m still learning this one)
Wearing shoes that are too small because they are cute. (I’m so sorry, feet)
Not stepping in or standing up for someone who is experiencing bullying of any type. (or speaking up against mean gossip)
Trusting outside voices more than my own internal voice. (and allowing those voices way too much power over me)
Being too blunt sometimes (Barbara, you’ve got to learn more about kindness)
Losing friends along the way of life (I know many of these friendships just change due to distance and such, but I still miss these people)
Not finding the aerial arts sooner!
Finding out another girl liked a guy so then I decided to lay claim to him (wow, i’m embarrassed about that one. fyi, I don’t do that anymore)
Not understanding how food fuels the body sooner
The hurtful, inconsiderate, uncaring things I’ve said to people because I didn’t know better (But, gosh, some of them were kind enough to reveal their hurt and to hold up a mirror to me so I could see myself and how I needed to change)
Not having my first kiss until 24 (hahaha, kissing is loads of fun. geeezzzz)
Thinking I had life all figured out when I was 12. (oh, bb girl, you had no idea what was coming)
Allowing fear to get in the way of advocating for myself, trying something new, doing something out of my comfort zone.
Forgetting that it’s okay for me to keep some parts of my life private.
Taking so dang long to start believing in myself and hard work to get me to my dreams.
Some of my fashion choices over the years have been a little out there.
All those mean thoughts about different people who I found/find/will-find annoying.
Eating 8 slices of pizza to prove that I was one of the guys (in middle school)…ugh that stomach ache.
Taking life WAY TOO SERIOUSLY (hun, it’s okay to jump and look later, sometimes. okay, you can peek. but please leap a little)

Life is not easy, but it is more than I could have ever imagined. And while some of my regrets are silly and some didn’t even make the list (because let’s be honest, healthy boundaries are crucial), each of these numbered items has shaped and taught me something. Regret is one of the best teachers.

So, happy birthday to me, and may I continue to live boldly, bravely, and kindly!

Love to all of you who’ve taken the time to wish me birthday greetings, read this post, and have walked alongside me in this life!

17 Kindnesses to Make Someone Else’s Day Brighter

January 13, 2020 Leave a Comment

Starting the year off with kindness and generosity is just the way I wanted to walk into 2020 and a new decade (and if you’ve been following along for a while then you know that I’m a January baby). So I spent minutes upon minutes scanning the internet (both Pinterest and the search engines) for lists of how other people have been kind or generous to other human beings. The lists were diverse, but they also had some commonalities.

I took those lists, and I compiled my own private list. And it’s been ridiculously fun to be “secret santa-ing” January. Nothing spreads more cheer than finding ways to brighten someone else’s day. Somehow, it has a boomerang effect, and every time I do good, I receive good.

17 Kindnesses

Give small gifts anonymously
Pay off a student’s lunch debt
Send someone flowers
Pay for someone behind you in the drive-through
Write an encouraging note for someone
Use Kiva.com to give a small loan
Do a social media shoutout for people who have inspired or positively impacted you
Pay for another table at a restaurant
Donate to your favorite cause
Send an encouraging text message
Pick up trash
Volunteer at an animal shelter
Write a thank-you note
Leave $5 in a Redbox movie for snacks
Leave a $5 Starbucks gift card in a library book
Send another table dessert
Order a bulk collection of something you can give away when the mood hits (party favor type things)

So far, my favorite to do was to ask people on my social media to respond to my story with an emoji, and in turn, I would look through their home page for a picture that I liked and then say something nice about them. I was so happy that people jumped in and participated. As my dad always says, “there’s never a bad a time for encouragement.”

I’d really like to live all of 2020 with an emphasis on kindness and care of other human beings.

Last week, I was chatting with a friend about how the reason I don’t watch the news is that my little life is already too heartbreaking. It sounds dramatic, I know. But I have limited capacity, and the world is so full of hurt that I feel that it could choke me out way too easily. The heartbreak that touches my life just from my small community is sometimes too much to stand.

So let’s throw kindnesses like glitter. We all need more love and more encouragement. Do you have favorite kindnesses to do for others?