Search results are a bit of a black hole, especially if you’re curious about what people are searching to eventually end up clicking on your website. I’d never really thought about it until recently (like this week).

I met Smudged Thoughts blog when I tumbled a blog comment Alice-in-Wonderland rabbit hole. And goodness gracious, what a quirky fun place. Smudged Thoughts shared some funny search terms that landed readers in her tiny section of cyber space.

I thought it was funny and interesting. So here I am…being a copy cat! Mrow.

Jumping Down the Black Hole of Search Results

Okay, so I’ve decided to work from the “All Time” section of the Search Results that WordPress has so kindly compiled for me. And goodness, let’s just say that my love of toilet humor shows…

1. Teleportation

YUP, you heard right (or uh, read right). Teleportation. People have searched the word “teleportation” and discovered my blog. And I know I’ve wished for teleportation a few times, but this is hardly the hub of teleportation.

Of course, I did write this post about wishing for teleportation travel.

Hmmm, maybe I should write a book about teleportation. But is it already an overused idea?

2. Types of Letter Writing

Well, this one doesn’t surprise me at all. I’ve always been addicted to the written word, and I love receiving snail mail, especially long letters with deep musings. Nothing makes me sadder than a greeting card with just a signature. I know, I know, it’s easy.

Now, my guess is that if you search “letter writing”… you either ended up at my Dream Job post or Support a Soldier letter writing.

(Also, I’ve been super pumped to receive two hand-written letters in the last few weeks…now I just need to reply)

3. Barbara Brutt Nice Kind

Where is that laughing with tears in the eyes emoji??? I really don’t think my name belongs next to “nice” or “kind.” Ha! But, I know why this search happened. You see, for a few weeks, I was on a mission to determine the difference between “nice” and “kind.”

I spent weeks bugging friends with my questions about the two words. I polled Facebook. And searched the internet. And then, I wrote Kind vs. Nice.

I’d be curious to know your opinion of “kind” and “nice.”

4. کشتن جوجه

I don’t know. I have absolutely NO clue. But somehow, someone is searching this collection of characters and ending up on my blog. It’s very pretty looking.

And a quick translation on the internet says that this means “kill the chickens.” *scratches head* I have killed a chicken before…

Oh, dear, I think my post about living in the Dominican Republic and killing a chicken maybe prompted this.

5. Japanese Toilet

And here we are. Toilets. I’m one of those ones. I’ve been giggling over bathroom humor for as long as I can remember. Woe to you if you bring up funny toilets at the dinner table. Bring your umbrella, raincoat, food shield.

I do spit-laugh food. I’ve worked hard to make this less of a reoccurring weather warning, but I can’t really be trusted around bathroom humor.

In Oh, Toilets, I take a peek at 3 different types of toilets.

6. How Do I Say Toilet Not Working in Dominican Republic

To the poor soul who googled that phrase and ended up on my blog, I am so sorry! All you found was my story of saying that the toilet doesn’t like me. So very different than “not working.”

Oh, but that is such a funny and embarrassing story.

Please sit on the toilet (because it’s only appropriate that you appreciate your flushing toilet) and enjoy Bathroom Embarrassments in the Dominican Republic.

Bonus: Ivys Caman Treats

I’ve been surprised at how many people have ended up on my website, searching for a way to order Ivy’s Cayman Treats (that link goes to my post, not an ordering website). My sister and I met her on our visit to the Cayman Islands two years ago. And Ivy was such a wonderful human being that I decided to write about her.

Now, I can’t just go traipsing across the globe to visit her again, but meeting Ivy certainly was memorable. If you happen to visit the Cayman Islands, you need to meet Ivy.

Now, I’m just thoroughly amused by all these search terms. There are a lot of other fun ones to explore, but I’ll leave those for another day. 🙂